Reframing the problem will trigger the mind to be creative and to think/do something different. Use the ‘wonderful if’ phrase: ‘Wouldn’t it be wonderful if…’ Use imagination and dreams to come up with many ‘off the wall’ ideas to help your creativity and then something sensible will come out of it. When dealing with conflict situations, there are certain words that would serve better than others in getting your point and feelings across.
You need to set boundaries and let other people know what these are. Some people are selfish or thoughtless and disregard your boundaries.
If you let things build up and you don’t express your feelings and needs, you will eventually feel resentment. Your reactions and body language may confuse people as they are not mind readers and may not understand your point of view. If you feel yourself getting angry, then say something for everyone’s sake.
Assertiveness is a strategy for gaining mutual respect that helps resolve conflicts. It is the key to good, clear, professional communication. It is about being neither passive and walked all over nor aggressive and confrontational – it’s about getting your point across in a confident manner. When you use assertiveness you can negotiate changes by stating directly what you think, feel and want.
Nearly all of us, at some time in our working lives, have to deal with difficult situations and difficult people. We therefore need to learn how to manage conflict to make sure that we continue enjoying going to work and building effective and efficient working relationships. Conflict can at best cause unproductive work days, and often leads to stress-related problems that result in sickness and absence from work.
When people are asked why they left their last job, the answer often involves a difficult boss. Some are really bad and no one finds it easy to work with them, whilst others simply have some very annoying habits. Sometimes an employee and a boss have a personality clash. If you do consider you have a difficult boss you should try to find out whether the problem lies with you, your boss, or a combination of the two.