Unless you’re on vacation, it is not a good day when you start your number one priority on the day’s to-do list at 5:00 pm. We tell ourselves that there are not enough hours in the day. Yet we mortals all have the same 24 hours. The problem is that we don’t protect our hours from being stolen. We let thieves steal time from us, day after day.
Emotions are important pieces of information that tell you about yourself and others, but in the face of stress that takes us out of our comfort zone, we can become overwhelmed and lose control of ourselves. With the ability to manage stress and stay emotionally present, you can learn to receive upsetting information without letting it override your thoughts and self-control. You’ll be able to make choices that allow you to control impulsive feelings and behaviors, manage your emotions in healthy ways, take initiative, follow through on commitments, and adapt to changing circumstances.
The skills that make up emotional intelligence can be learned at any time. However, it’s important to remember that there is a difference between simply learning about EQ and applying that knowledge to your life. Just because you know you should do something doesn’t mean you will—especially when you become overwhelmed by stress, which can override your best intentions. In order to permanently change behavior in ways that stand up under pressure, you need to learn how to overcome stress in the moment, and in your relationships, in order to remain emotionally aware.
As we know, it’s not the smartest people who are the most successful or the most fulfilled in life. You probably know people who are academically brilliant and yet are socially inept and unsuccessful at work or in their personal relationships. Intellectual ability or your intelligence quotient (IQ) isn’t enough on its own to achieve success in life. Yes, your IQ can help you get into college, but it’s your EQ that will help you manage the stress and emotions when facing your final exams. IQ and EQ exist in tandem and are most effective when they build off one another.
Emotional intelligence (otherwise known as emotional quotient or EQ) is the ability to understand, use, and manage your own emotions in positive ways to relieve stress, communicate effectively, empathize with others, overcome challenges and defuse conflict. Emotional intelligence helps you build stronger relationships, succeed at school and work, and achieve your career and personal goals. It can also help you to connect with your feelings, turn intention into action, and make informed decisions about what matters most to you.
Engage with your audience
To avoid reading word-for-word from your notes. Instead, make a list of important points on cue cards, or, as you get better at public speaking, try to memorize what you’re going to say – you can still refer back to your cue cards when you need them.
There’s a good reason that we say, “Practice makes perfect!” You simply cannot be a confident, compelling speaker without practice. To get practice, seek opportunities to speak in front of others. If you’re going to be delivering a presentation or prepared speech, create it as early as possible. The earlier you put it together, the more time you’ll have to practice.
Stress management starts with identifying the sources of stress in your life. This isn’t as easy as it sounds. Your true sources of stress aren’t always obvious, and it’s all too easy to overlook your own stress-inducing thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Sure, you may know that you’re constantly worried about work deadlines. But maybe it’s your procrastination, rather than the actual job demands, that leads to deadline stress.
It may seem that there’s nothing you can do about your stress level. The bills aren’t going to stop coming, there will never be more hours in the day for all your errands, and your career or family responsibilities will always be demanding. But you have a lot more control than you might think. In fact, the simple realization that you’re in control of your life is the foundation of stress management.
Metaphors are like mini-stories. You tie something that someone understands to a new idea or concept. I LOVE metaphors—I think they are the most powerful way to get ideas across. For example, I teach people how to read micro-expressions and liken the ability to decode the face to watching life in High Definition TV. All of a sudden you see things that you didn’t notice before. In other words, I turn the skill of decoding facial expressions into a metaphor with the connection to HDTV. Let me tell you, whenever I use this metaphor with live audiences, people either audibly will say, “oh” or “ah” or nod their head yes, as if it clicked for them. That’s the power of a good metaphor.
Social environment theory is of the social and behavioral scientists. It says that we must consider the situation, the social context in which we will work. When we work and communicate together, we all participate in a social situation. Within that situation, each agrees to assume certain roles –such as “compromiser,” “initiator,” “or “encourager” –based on our part in the activity.
According to Henry Mintzberg, management have three basic jobs: to collect and convey information, to make decisions, and to promote interpersonal unity. Every one of those jobs is carried out through communication. Managers collect relevant information from conversations, the grapevine, phone calls, memos, reports, databases, and the Internet. They convey information and decisions to other people inside or outside the organization through meetings, speeches, press releases, videos, memos, letters, and reports. Managers motivate organizational members in speeches, memos, conversations at lunch and over coffee, bulletin boards, and through “management by walking around.”
Business depends on communication. People must communicate to plan products; hire, train, and motivate workers; coordinate manufacturing and delivery; persuade customers to buy; and bill them for the sale. Indeed, for many businesses and nonprofit and government organizations, the “product” is information or services rather than something tangible. Information and services are created and delivered by communication. In every organization, communication is the way people get their points across and get work done.
The life-changing importance of communication
Communication is so much more than just the spoken or written word. At its best it is a multifaceted process through which we exchange information with the world around us. We use communication skills in every aspect of our lives: at work, with family and friends, even with ourselves.
Csutoras said, “Focus on meaningful connections when networking. Through conversation, identify people you naturally connect with, who are driven, smart, and knowledgeable of your industry. Then take the time to solidify that connection, with a meal, drink, or repeat conversations.” Csutoras added, “One single meaningful connection is way more valuable than a number of insignificant connections you never quite feel comfortable following up with down the road.”
Many people believe that networking during a job search / an event means calling everyone and asking them for a job/meeting. People associate networking with being pushy and overbearing. Some people tend to hide away from networking because they don’t want to be labeled as this type of person. Networking is a two way street, it is a way of getting to know someone better and finding ways they might be able to help you and how you can help them in return.